How To Date Your Friend

coffee-date
Alright, so you’re convinced. You’re going to make him yours. But how? This is way different than getting together with a guy you’re not friends with. We’re in uncharted territory here.
There’s good news though. You have a natural advantage: access. You’re close and you clearly get along. You know a lot about him and you know what he likes and doesn’t like. And if you two are really close, you know what he likes in a woman and what he doesn’t like.
With that in mind, follow these rules to have your best chance to go from friends to dating with no drama.

Don’t rush
I know you’ve been pining after him for months but that doesn’t mean you have to go from 0 to 100 just like that.
In fact, it’s all the more reason to take your time. Think out what you’re going to do and even if it takes a month for him to get the hint, you’ll have more luck than if you just throw yourself at him.

Don’t vomit your feelings

Life is not a romantic comedy. Don’t hold in your feelings for your friend until you explode with a big long speech about how you love them and want to be together forever.
As charming as it is when Rachel McAdams does it, it rarely goes this way in real life. Your goal is to not put too much pressure on him, yourself and the relationship. Going too fast too early is a great way to make men pull away and lose interest.
If you can make the transition easier then you’ll be getting this new dynamic off to a great start. There’ll be room to get mushy later.

Don’t stop dating

It seems like a good idea to make yourself as available as possible and to show him that you’re not interested in other guys while you’re trying to get him to notice you. This is actually the wrong approach. Here’s why.
It will make him jealous and make you look desirable.
Plus, it’ll make dating you seem like more of a possibility and not some huge deal. If he thinks you never date then even if he likes you he’ll be less likely to make a move. You want it to seem like dating is something that you do for fun.
That means it’s not a big deal and less likely to ruin your friendship if it doesn’t go 100% right. This raises the chances of him asking you out.

Don’t sleep with him

To be blunt, just because he sleeps with you doesn’t mean he wants to date you.
In fact, it can leave you in a weird grey area between friends and dating. If he can get your friendship and your body, why should he want to make things more committed and official?
It’s the sad truth that guys don’t want to rock the boat and scare women off so he’ll take what he can get, rather than risk getting too serious.

Be more flirty

Guys can be pretty dense. You want to get him to realize you’re interested in more than friendship without coming right out and saying it (at least for now). Ramp up the flirting.
Laugh at his jokes and touch his arm. In a group setting, focus on him more than anyone else because he’s more than just another friend.
Don’t be afraid to show him you’re excited to see him and that you have fun together. Hugs are more than encouraged. This is step one to making a man fall in love.

Ask questions

Your role as his friend gives you the inside scoop about what he likes, what he’s interested in.
Don’t avoid getting flirty and asking him about dating and girls.
This is a great way to get the idea in his head that you’re interested in being more than friends.

Always look your best

It’s always a good idea to take pride in your appearance. Make sure your look is on point, ditch the sweats, and keep it tight.
Don’t be afraid to show some skin. Normally I don’t recommend this when trying to attract a guy but you two are already close. He sees you as a friend. You want him to see you as a woman.

Make him feel like it’s his idea

By upping your affection, flirting and time spent with him, you’re going to change the way he thinks without him even knowing. If this works he’ll think he’s come up with this all on his own.

If all else fails, just be up front

There’s nothing wrong with the direct approach.
There are plenty of guys out there who wouldn’t know flirting if it punched them in the face.
For these guys, I’d recommend talking about it. This comes back to managing your expectations and being honest with yourself about his feelings.
If you think you still have a shot, then ask him out. If it doesn’t work out, at least you tried.

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